The real story is change is hard with no guarantees or magic bullets.
OK, that sucks.
But I should know that since I have a shelf full of magic bullet diet books that didn't work and bottles of magic bullet diet aids that didn't work and wonderful workout clothes (in another size). I should have a clue that magic bullets don't work.
A longtime facebook friend recently posted that she lost 70 pounds. I was so happy for her, but wait, HOW? She is about my age so that dispels the notion women cannot lose weight "later" in life. I just wanted to know how so she told me her diet...
No sugar, lower carb intake, rarely eats dairy (except for homemade lactose free yogurt) lots of fresh vegetables and fruit and a little meat.
Poof! 9 months of staying on that plan she lost 70 pounds. There's the magic....there is no magic.
OK, that sucks.
My problem is I want something that will do the work for me, as my fabulous grandmother Minnie always, always said to me, "Donna Lynn I'm not afraid of work, I can lay down right next to it and go to sleep!" I want to take a pill and not have an appetite. I want to put on new workout clothes and be a size 8. I want someone to clean out the refrigerator and restock it with only fresh vegetables, fruit and homemade yogurt and I want the protein portions controlled and ready when I am.
I want magic but so far it has been illusive.
One year ago my husband had a terrible heart event that most people don't know much about. When he was having a hard time breathing we took him to the emergency room. After an angiogram they discovered his heart was functioning at 15%, his blood pressure was very, very high and his sugar numbers were too high to repeat.
15% is the number we focused on. His heart was functioning at 15%...
When the doctor came out and told us we were terrified, I had survived a huge, scary emergency that traumatised my family and now we were facing a similar situation with Raymond. The doctor went on to tell us surgery wasn't possible because too much damage had occurred. He needed to change everything about his life. He needed to take the medicine he was ignoring, the diet he was careless with needed to improve and exercise that he wouldn't do, needed to start. It was a scary week at the hospital, but we left with hope. The doctor told us if he changed, his heart would rejuvenate, he could get better. He went on to explain that when a heart is given the opportunity to heal it will find a way to transport blood. He had two arteries that were no longer functional, but the heart would find another way. He just had to change and there would be an opportunity to heal, if not the doctor said he had about 2 years.
There is magic....because one year later his heart is functioning at 62%. His blood pressure is normal and his diabetes is under far better control.
My husband today with the whole family |
We can change, we can get better. Don't let anyone tell you that you are too old or too young or too busy. We all have obstacles to overcome in order to achieve what is best for us. Living in a world filled with temptation is hard, we revolve around fast food and convenience stores. We are constantly falling down and we need to find the motivation to get up, move on and succeed at what we truly want.
There are ways to prevent defeat, I promise. These are the 3 new tools I am using. By the way this works for any change you want to make.
1.) Believe you can make the change. We often start a change journey half heartedly. We are filled with excuses why we cannot change, and the only reason for that is it is HARD to change. Accept that...it's hard and don't beat yourself up over that either. We want a quick fix, but it simply does not exist. Analyze your life and write down the hard things you have already accomplished or overcome and realize you have the ability to do hard things. The life you have already lived is proof you can do hard things. Get a pen! I know you have done many difficult things...write them down. Do you beat yourself up because you ate dessert and now you believe you don't have will power? Me! That's me!! I have plenty of will power and I have done very hard things in my life. I know I can do this, I know I am powerful and I can make this change because I will feel better. Because what I really want is to continue taking care of my family, I want to live life and I cannot do that without my health.
2.) Find a tribe. Find people willing to support you, educate you and cheer for you. For me it has been Biometrix because They are specifically trained for folks like me. You know, the ones who do not think they can lift a heavy weight 15 straight times, or pop that rope, or do so many squats you think you are now shaped like a question mark. No one has ever been able to get me to believe in myself the way they have. You must find a tribe. I have lots of other tribes also by the way. I have a writing tribe, I have a church tribe, I have a best friend that never says she is too busy for me. I have a mommy tribe, a gardening tribe, a neighborhood tribe, a government tribe, a political tribe (I will never reveal their names we are a covert group!) a business tribe, a facebook/Instagram tribe, a food tribe, a decorating tribe and my ultimate tribe...my family. Lean on them and be there when they need you also.
Part Of My Biometrix Tribe |
3.) Be specific in what you want and expect to do. Nothing was ever created without a thought first, followed by a plan. You will not change without knowing what that change will look like. Your brain wants to help you, tell it what you want to do each day before you do anything else, and then continue throughout the day reaffirming those plans. Be specific in what you expect to do and then at the end of the day return and report. In your "report" write down what you did that worked and what didn't. Then - without any negative phrases at all - write down how you will avoid that set back the next day. Live an intentional life by using intentional words. Not If, when. Not could - Will. And focus on just one day....today.
My wellness goals are very simple and just an example, yours will be different.
- 10,000 steps each day, be active...park far away, use the stairs, go for a walk, dance, sing and dance....be active!
- Eat food that looks like the container it originally came in, vegetables, fruits, nuts, seeds, fish (I have to throw in chicken but without the feathers)
- Train 3 days a week at Biometrix
- Write goals each morning and affirm throughout the day. Return and report at night and make necessary changes.
- Celebrate every single win! Right now I consciously get up from a chair without touching anything. It's just a bad habit to help yourself up, so don't. Due to strength training (squats) it is becoming much, much easier. That could be a win I overlook but I won't. So we went to the movies.
- Drink 8 bottles of water. I know its a lot of water but it is very important.
See that heavy ball? I use that...I am kind of awesome |
Tara....part of my tribe |
My friend Cameron killing the box jumps - no I will not be doing this. |
Notice there is never just one exercise? She is doing 2 things at once...my brain often just rebels, it is only used to walking... |
Sometimes I think I have stumbled on Caligula's Lair |
I especially love #2, Donna. Find a tribe. I think that is so important at any stage of our lives, and especially at this one. Thank you for sharing this journey with us!
ReplyDeleteI loved reading this! You are motivating! I liked the references to magic. I love magic! I guess we have to make our own magic!
ReplyDeleteDonna, I am so blessed to call you my friend. You inspire me in so many ways: getting healthy, no excuses, becoming my own priority, your loving heart, and the list goes on.
ReplyDeleteI Love Love Love your blog!
Smooch! Anne
I look forward to y our posts. This Biometrix place must be wonderful.
ReplyDeleteYour're far more than 'kind of' awesome!
ReplyDeleteOh Donna, I love reading your posts. I always finish them with a smile of my face. I've returned to exercise after a couple of years of illness and injury. The first month was the hardest, but I am now seeing a difference in ability and waistline! I still have days when I don't really want to go, but I have a workout buddy (my tribe?) and we hold each other accountable.
ReplyDeleteYou made me cry! Thank you for the shout out! I still struggle every day - but I continue on my journey to good health and even lost a few more pounds this week! I am now at 75 lbs lost! I can hardly believe my success! But it is because of the three things you stated, 1.EVERY single day I repeat to myself "You can do hard things" over and over again. 2. I have a tribe (anyone want to join? - we support each other!) 3. I am on a journey to gain back my health (and I AM DOING IT!!!!!) Love to you and your journey!
ReplyDeleteYou are not only doing great things for yourself, but you are helping others in the process...I'm glad to be part of your tribe...I love you! :)
ReplyDeleteThank you. So inspire me ...
ReplyDeletenice and very good post!
ReplyDelete