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Saturday, May 31, 2014

Notice to Mattress salespeople

Notice to mattress salespeople - stop.

Stop trying to sell a mattress to me by describing the pounds of human cells, sweat and other bodily droppings that are imbedded (imbedded! HA!) in my mattress.  I heard a commercial this morning that basically described any mattress as a toxic dump.  Your scare tactics won't work, instead I am going to keep my mattress a bit longer and just ask my exterminator to spray it.

And while I am at it, the new commercial for. "I've fallen and can't get up" sounds more like water boarding than someone at the bottom of the stairs.  Please stop.

How about the folks who call selling medical supplies pretending like they work with your doctor.  "it's time to reorder, what would you like?"  One caller made a terrible mistake when he suggested I didn't want my husband to stay healthy since I wasn't buying his particular medical line of love.  The last person who threatened me that way dealt with impotence and baldness after a small but reliable curse I place on people who displease me.   We had an understanding before he hung up that he would never call again.

How about the calls that sound like they are from your credit card company, but are really just folks looking to consolidate your debt?  They make it sound like you missed a payment?  Mistake

And while I am on the subject, never ever respond to anyone calling me about carpet cleaning.  They offer a great deal, come to your home and tell you they cannot possibly clean your hideous carpet without using the same formula Superman drinks every morning.  Which by the way is far and above the quoted price.  No matter not ever allow them to clean your carpet, I don't care if all of your furniture is outside and you have a party the next day....get them out of your house and find someone who isn't using fraud as a marketing tool.  Be strong!!

Ever get your oil changed only to get a list of possible problems that claim would keep you from getting your children to soccer practice safely?  Aren't you a better mother than that?  And then 60 minutes shows up....fabulous.

There is a solution....find someone with a personal reference.  Ask your friends for referrals and then take a minute to call and ask about their experience.  Find someone who has used their exterminator for years, the same carpet cleaner, the same mechanic, the same appliance repairman the same caterer, the same hairdresser and stockbroker.  Buyer beware means it's on you.  There are lots of people out there who do a great job.  Repairmen who get a charge (ha!) out of fixing your stuff. It's like a puzzle to them...they love it, and they know how much their time is worth.  There are air conditioning guys who are thrilled to turn on a newly repaired unit and give you relief, my carpet guy (All American Carpet Cleanres) is the happiest man I have ever met.  When I get new carpet - which I desperately need - he is going to miss me.  We have a great relationship because he has singlehandedly gotten my carpet through years longer than it should have.  We have shared salsa recipes and family stories.  Mark Andrews ( who took all the pictures for my website and is simply amazing.  Also, I love my butcher because he is thrilled to find enough chicken for me when we put an event together.  Melissa who lovingly grooms my dogs so well that they wag their tails when we arrive at Love-A-Pup!!

Think of all the people who make your life work....reward them with referrals and your thanks.  I am not saying you shouldn't learn to do things for yourself, right now my husband is changing my daughter's brakes, but don't think you have to do everything yourself.  I heard a man admit he hired a handyman to tackle a list a mile and a year long that his wife had waved in front of his face for months.  The squeaky door, the leaky faucet, the broken window, the door latch, the fan that needed to be installed and some shelves that needed to be hung.  All so annoying!!  When his wife came home to an all fixed house she was elated!!  Weeks later he confessed to her he had hired it out.  And guess what?  She was furious!  She felt he should have fixed everything himself and he felt nothing but relief and peace that it was done.  Isn't that what keeps us from some projects?  We think we can do it, and either we can't or don't have time and it never gets done.

So, bless my heart, I am opening the cage, fly my friends, fly!!  Hire someone you trust, someone that you will have to pay, but deserve the pay for a job well done.  Lets get the economy going!!