Search This Blog

Tuesday, November 27, 2018

What do you want?

Women are not very good at accepting compliments but we are very good at shrinking...we are also not very good at thinking we can BE anything...

How come? 

I would like to know because I suck so badly at accepting compliments I could move the curtains in a room. And giving myself permission to think I can be anything I want has not been in my wheelhouse. Reality is we have all been given gifts and talents...all of us. But when complimented on a talent or gift women notoriusly act small. We take compliments and store them away rarely looking or appreciating them. Instead of being grateful for what compliments are, an acknowledgment of a gift from God, we hit them back to the sender like a down-the-line tennis shot. Somehow it seems noble to stick our toe in the sand and engage in "mock humility". 

Marianne Williamson wrote my all time favorite quote. (It's long and can be found in its entirety in "Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of "a Course in Miracles")  I am just using only a bit of it. 

"There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as Children we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same." 

Notice this part, "We are all meant to shine, as children do."

As Children do....When I think of my children as little people they were such intrepid little performers! And talent wasn't a prerequisite - who cared if they had talent? They just wanted to experience everything! They used every part of their being and did it fearlessly. They drew pictures, wrote stories, performed cannonballs, danced, did cartwheels, played ball, they sang, they dressed up and performed monologues, they made movies starring themselves, they invented games, built forts, jumps and obstacle courses. We watched it, over and over and over. 

But then as we get older our inner critic gets louder and suddenly all we can hear is what we cannot do. 

Another Marianne Williamson quote....

"Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?"

Think about that, "Who are you not to be?"

And if you are brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous can't you do anything? 

So first believe then think about what you want.

Do you know what you want? I became so filled with fear over the course of my life that I actually stopped thinking about what I wanted, I stopped asking for anything, I didn't know what I wanted because I stopped thinking I could have anything...I did all I could to shrink. 

If you are not where you want to be.... what are you waiting for?

I believe you can do anything you can envision. And nothing was anything before it was a thought. Think about that....everything starts off as a thought...everything. From the chair I am sitting in to the food I eat everything started off as a thought. 

What do you want?

Noah keeps asking Allie what she wants and she says it isn't that easy. But it was that easy wasn't it? When she let herself really think about what she wanted, well she wanted Noah. And it was that easy.

What do you want? 

For me I wanted to feel better and be stronger because I want to give a Ted Talk...but I decided I was too old and it was all too late. I thought I was always going to feel old and out of shape. But then I started working out and that has been the first step to doing what I really want. When you physically push yourself it is amazing how that seeps into everything else. Find something that really challenges you, that forces you to get out of your rut and then you can do the next thing and the next thing and the next thing. For me doing something physical is almost magic. I don't know how to describe it except exercise has been medicinal, it clears my stamina is better, my balance is better and because of those things I am less fearful. Exercise helps me realize I'm not too old and there is still time to do the things I want to do. When I pound those heavy ropes I'm kind of a badass...

What do you want? Today, this day, sit down and write it out, because I know you know, just like Allie knew...because it's simple. 

You know what you want....write it down and send it to me.

Xuberance has changed my life and it can change yours also. Put yourself in the hands of a team dedicated to your health. From personal trainers that know more about you than you do, to a massage therapist who can literally take your pains away, to a dietician dedicated to your food health they all work together for your good. There is even a doctor who monitors your over all health. To be sure there are other ways to achieve this effect but I just don't know of a place that has everything under one roof the way Xuberance does. Call for a tour 702-750-9420. You won't regret it. 

Monday, November 19, 2018

New Season! New Ideas! More Success

I gathered my kitchen cabinet, my brain trust...the folks I love the most, the people who know me with make-up and without, My people...and I explained to them I have some fitness momentum but I am staring Thanksgiving right in the gobble-gobble. Heck I'm staring the holidays right in the Ho-Ho-Ho.

What's a girl to do?

With my fitness/eating momentum humming along I am understandably.....SCARED TO DEATH!!
The previous "after Thanksgiving system" has simply been eat yourself into a coma, get up the next morning and curse if someone has used all the gravy - (because in the hierarchy of leftovers gravy is practically golden because who will make that again?) and then start over...this system is the regular deal until January 1.....I have been incredibly loyal to this system, I don't even know another system.
That's why I approached my people and asked them to help me come up with an alternate plan

Here are some of the things we came up with...

Thanksgiving week....Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday are full on exercise days.
Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday are careful eating days. What I mean by that is a good breakfast (today was 2 slices of bacon and 2 eggs - it got me through to dinner, happily. And that includes no samples at Costco) then a good dinner. No snacking, no sweets.

And then to Thanksgiving...we aren't going to have dinner? Of course we are, but that is where I am going clever. Instead of lounging around and having our usual bagels after the Turkey Bowl (football game in the morning) I am going to get some serious walking in. Then I am going to enjoy my dinner. I am going to enjoy my pie...But we have added some fun vegetables previously uneaten by the Tag clan before and I intend to make them a bigger part of the feast.

Friday I want to gather up the troops and go to a local state park called Red Rock Canyon and hike around...I'm shaking everything up. And then back to my warm, cozy house where we can put up the Christmas Tree while watching football. And yes I am going to have leftovers. But I am not going to stand in front of the fridge and just randomly eat things, like turning the whipped cream can upside down in my mouth,....I will have a plan to enjoy everything. Intentional living...

 After having enjoyed the holidays for 2 days on Saturday I am back! Lots of water, exercise and going outside more.

December will be intentional each day. I will have a treat on the weekend but not through the week. Since we are caterers and around rich food all the time I have been unconsciously eating, I get so tired during the month that I think eating will give me energy when in fact it takes energy away.

I will go over my plan each morning...I will repeat it to myself...that is how we make things real and keep them in front of us by saying it all out loud.

Sleep, water, exercise and planning. Nothing crazy, just a plan...a realistic plan.

I am also going to remind myself I can do this. I am going to say it, not just think it.

Another reason I am so intent on staying the course is a very important anniversary is tomorrow....two years ago I almost died from an aortic dissection. Very few people survive that little number and I realize I have been given another chance so I am intent, finally, on taking care of my health and my life. It took me a long time to process the entire event, but I am starting to understand a whole lot. Xuberance has helped me so much, my friend Patrice who guided me to this amazing place told me that Xuberance showed her things she never knew about herself. I know what she means now. When you really push yourself, when you finally get to that place where real change can occur, you realize how far you can go. I let preconceived ideas of aging cloud my potential. I thought since I was older that older people don't push themselves that hard. But if I can survive almost dying then I can swing that dang kettlebell, those ghastly heavy ropes and anything else I am challenged with. I intend to age...the alternative is a bit bleak, but I am not going to let conventionality tell me what aging will be like. Happy Anniversary to me!!!
Right after they knew I would be ok a friend of the family took this picture of two of my children

Scout and Emma

These precious little girls are in my life now and I am so happy things worked out 2 years ago!!

I am happy to share the incredible news of Xuberance a new wellness center in Las Vegas Nevada. A full service center dedicated to helping you reach your highest health potential. With a doctor on staff, regular blood work, fitness testing, weekly therapeutic massage, a dietician on staff,  and expert fitness trainers you cannot go wrong on becoming your best and healthiest you.
4280 S. Hualapai Way Ste. 104 
Las Vegas, Nevada 89147
(702) 750-9420

Monday, November 12, 2018

Some Thoughts On The Wellness Journey

A friend asked me the other day about my wellness journey....

It has been a soul searching experience. What I don't like is how hard it is to eat the food the dietician proscribes. The food is great, it is doable on every level and his support is amazing, but I haven't followed an actual plan in years so to suddenly be accountable has been challenging.

So what am I doing to meet this challenge?

I work at it everyday and I experiment with food. When I find balance in a meal I don't crave food that  makes me feel lousy. This week the mid morning snack was Greek yogurt with agave and blueberries. It was a great feeling of balance.

I took that as a "win". A small victory but a win.

Part of my journey has been becoming aware. It's a simple thing yet so important. It's why the act of writing down what you eat is so important. We unconsciously do so many things that of course we lose track. I made a goal of writing down what I ate so that I could be aware of what I was eating. We are caterers and we taste food all the time. But when I am aware of what I am doing I eat intentionally.

Another part of my journey has been accepting the new "normal" that is my life. I take medication that slows down my heart and makes me so very, very tired, an offshoot of that is it also  slows down my metabolism also. My metabolism before the surgery was already sloth like, now I take medication designed to put cement in my shoes and you can understand how I feel. I accept I will feel tired, but I do not accept a "tired" life. I lift weights, do push-ups, I sling a heavy ball around and I am fierce with those damn heavy ropes. I do accept wellness is a challenge, but I do not accept it is a challenge I cannot handle.

I admit I assumed a lot of things when I started this, I assumed I was too old and too out of shape. If you feel this way you must find different voices to listen to. I know it isn't true because I am getting better.  Even if this week it is just finding out Greek yogurt with blueberries is better than a bagel you win, write it down and celebrate!

Write down a specific goal for the day.

The do it.

Then feel great about yourself!

When my son was in college he played football for a team that had a very long losing streak...very long. When they hired a new coach his first job was to teach each player how to win again because they had forgotten. He made them race to get water and then enjoy the feeling of being first. They raced on the field, in the weight room, they raced to see who could be first at breakfast, who got the best grades. Nothing was too small to compete over. They began to remember what the feeling of winning was like again along with a feeling of success and accomplishment. I have forgotten what it feels like to be in shape, to be able "to run and not be weary". I have forgotten what it feels like to say, "I'm full." But just like my son's coach made his players aware of what winning/success/accomplishment felt like I can remember what it feels like to make a goal and achieve it, to be aware of what I eat and to set reasonable boundaries. To feel that accomplishment, to revel in success. Those feelings build on each other and you begin to see who you can really be...what you can truly accomplish.

You are way bigger than you imagine, and you can do way more than you ever thought.

Every morning dedicate the day....write a reasonable goal in 3 categories each day for health, mind and spirit. Health could be drinking enough water, mind could be reading something challenging and spirit could be forgiving everyone you come in contact with.

Ponder for a moment before you write your challenge down.....then as you write it down commit to doing it. Then do it.

At the end of the day "return and report". When you succeed, honor it with joy! When things don't go as planned examine what went wrong and how you could have done better. You are the project manager of your life so treat this journey as a job. That idea annoyed me at first but then I realized how seriously I take my work and how causal I was with my health. I have been on this journey for only 3 months and many, many things are better. I am a work in progress and realize I have not taken care of myself for a long time.

But I am getting better.

My wellness center, Xuberance, has been instrumental in helping me regain physical confidence after a very difficult recovery from an aortic dissection. The trainers have been patient, incredibly instructional and never let me do more than I can...but then they never let me do less than I can  either. I feel safe there and that feeling is paramount in my life right now. 
For more information call 702-750-9420

Tuesday, November 6, 2018

Some Days Are Just Wonderful!

Voting Day was a big deal in my home growing up. My father always took me along.  I went right in the voting booth with him, the curtain closed and there were levers to pull. My father let me pull those levers, we did that together. Everyone knew us at the polling place, people named Old Tom, and Shirley...Aunt Stuff and Billy Joe, Billy Bob and Bubba. People who worked so hard for the little they had. They were mostly fishermen as we lived on the Gulf. But there were car mechanics, and plumbers, there were landscapers and bartenders. My dad knew them all, from the man who ran the feed store to the folks who ran the small grocery we were a group of folks who leaned on each other and helped each other. We rooted for the small high school team on Friday nights, laughed and argued with each other at the county fair over who made the best chocolate cake. We attended weddings and funerals...we were a true small town in Texas. And all of those people were accounted for at the polling place every Election Day. No one missed....

I hope my chidlren have those kind of memories of Election Day. I have only missed one election that I can remember. But I do know that it is my responsibility to is my “burden of the community to bear” and I do it happily with honor. Most of those people who surrounded me at the polling place had been in one war or another and I do it for them and for all the ones who have gone since.

I am so grateful to live in America. So grateful to cast my vote...I hope all the winners do the best job they can, they are responsible to us.

So please go Vote!!!!

Thursday, November 1, 2018

A New Day...New Start

Remember how you felt the first day of school? Everything was new and possibilities were endless? Your shoes were new and your lunch box was filled with great food because mom wasn't burnt out yet. There were new people to meet, a new teacher to torture...the possibilities were endless!

And the same when the year is new, another opportunity to start over and renew. Remember the feeling you had to write down goals? Make resolutions? The idea of a "new year" was thrilling...the possibilities were endless!

It's in all of us to renew, to reassess, to simply start over, because we want to try new things, we want to learn new things. We want to break bad habits and create new great habits. As I said it is part of who we are. 

Then that little voice pops up, the one that whispers in our ear.....

"you have tried this before and failed"

Then the endless possibilities floats away when we decide to listen 

We are all hard wired to fail, expect it,  because first we are hardwired to learn, grow and progress. One of my favorite quotes comes from Thomas Monson..who said, 

"God left the world unfinished for man to work his skill upon. He left the electricity in the clouds, the oil in the earth. He left the rivers unbridged and the forests felled and the cities unbuilt. God gives to man the challenge of raw materials, not the ease of finished things. He leaves the pictures unpainted and the music unsung and the problems unsolved, that man might know the joys and glories of creation."

As we are solving problems, inventing things, creating things, writing songs, painting pictures and just thinking of things to do. We will fail...sometimes many many times. But we must start over.

Starting over, facing a new day, picking yourself up is joy!...not failure. 

Have you faced the same problem a hundred times until you just want to give up? Vincent Van Gogh said, " If you hear a voice in your head that says you cannot paint, then paint! That voice will be silenced." 

I have to start over too, just like everyone else. So when my vacation interrupted my "wellness routine". I became discouraged and I have found it so hard to get back on track. When we returned it was to the blessing of work is also a great excuse not to exercise and with holidays approaching certainly not a time to eat well. I assessed this journey yesterday....strapped on my big girl pants and went to Xuberance to work out. Did I want to? No, because I knew how hard it was going to be. And I wasn't wrong..but I cannot give up, I cannot go back where I was when I am not even close to where I want to be. My trainer Anthony and I spoke honestly to each other. I told him what I wanted to do...nothing. He told me I had to decide right then what I wanted to do. I could live through a few hard days and be back on track, or stop.

Give up? Never!!

This quote embodies my truth...

"Live your truth. Express your love. Share your enthusiasm. Take action towards your dreams. Walk your talk. Dance and sing to your music. Embrace your blessings. Make today worth remembering." - Dr. Steve Maraboli

Without health I cannot do the things I want to do. Without losing weight I will not be able to chase grandbabies, I won't be able to MOVE!! Moving is getting I give up now? Last year I would have, this break would have given me the excuse to start over in January and I would have struggled through the holidays. No! So I went back, it was hard but I did it. 

Anthony believes I can do this, and I only need one person to believe in me, but I have a whole team who believe in me. Jeremy the dietician at Xuberance believes in me (no reason why, because I am his worst client - he is almost a counselor embodied in his nutrition knowledge with me) Paula who greets me every day encourages me to work out, eat well and get a massage! Dr. Docasar who carefully devised a list of supplements I need and gave me the good news that since I have started at Xuberance all my numbers are within range. Darling Gene and Lisa Carrejo who own Xuberance are personally invested in my success, they know everything I am doing. (They followed me on facebook during my vacation and asked how my cheesesteak face) I have incredible support at Xuberance, but I have to plan my food, I have to go to the gym and work out....I still have to work this plan. And why has food been my achilles heel? I don't know, but I intend to make it my greatest achievement

The Obstacle in the path becomes the path. Never forget, within every obstacle is an opportunity to improve our condition." - Zen Parable

I never really thought of myself as courageous, but after reading this quote I saw myself and then realized it does take courage to reach your goals, to believe in yourself and to accept a life without constant comfort. 

I will forever be grateful to my friends at Xuberance who have given me every opportunity to get healthy, my most important job. Some health problems occur out of the blue, but many are preventable. Dr. Docasar gave me the good news that my blood work is great so I am off and running! 

What challenges are you facing that just a good shove won't cure?