The 24th of July

Today is the 24th of July and for those of you unaware of Mormon history it is the day in 1847 that Brigham Young arrived in the Salt Lake Valley and declared "This is the place!"  That started the largest exodus of pioneers in our American history.  For decades Mormon pioneers walked behind handcarts, drove wagons pulled by oxen or just willed themselves across the plains.  They came from every place you can imagine.  From factory workers in England, to farmers in Switzerland, they all answered a call to, "come to Zion."  Zion is what they called the Salt Lake Valley and that term was later broadened to anywhere Mormon pioneers were asked to settle.  Brigham Young was not the gentlest nor the kindest soul, but he had the perfect personality to get all those Saints west.  They needed someone tough to lead them as it is serious business to prepare a gentle dairy farmer from Norway to travel thousands of miles with his elderly parents and small children.  Brigham Young was just the guy.

Most of the pioneers made it to the Salt Lake Valley safely, of course it was extremely difficult but they got up every morning and walked west.  They were prepared with enough food and left with enough time to get to Salt Lake before winter.  But some of the pioneers were in groups that left a bit later in the year than expected and encountered the most horrible deprivation you could imagine.  They endured early snowstorms, starvation, sickness and death.  None of my ancestors were Mormon pioneers so it wasn't until the recent past that I began to appreciate the sacrifice these people made.  Their lives are an example to me, as they should be to everyone, of never giving up.  Examples of following something bigger than themselves.  You don't have to be Mormon, or even have pioneer ancestors to appreciate that.



I hope we all follow something that is bigger than ourselves.  That is how we challenge ourselves.  We never know how tall we are until we are in over our heads.  And when it becomes discouraging to keep going, to keep "walking west." we need something to encourage us.  God could have made Utah easier to get to for them, but he didn't.  It was a challenge to get there, certainly a way to measure their commitment.  Most made it, but some gave up.  I have searched for the pioneer story of the woman who simply sat down by her wagon and said, "I am not going another step. I quit, I give up.....I am finished"  I know it is there, even if it is unwritten, you know some had to feel that way, but for the most part they got up, dusted themselves off and kept walking west.  And in our own lives we have to keep walking "west" to whatever our west is.

We have examples of walking west around us everyday.  People challenged by almost everything.  God uses this fallen world to teach us who we are, because He already knows who we are and what we can do.  The problem is we don't.  We don't know how very powerful we are.  So we have this world to teach us how powerful we are.  We get the opportunity to overcome pain or disappointment which in turns teaches us how tall we really are.

By way of happy coincidence, 20 years ago today we bought our little acre of happiness.  After years of searching for our perfect place to live my husband attended a land auction on the 24th of July 1993 and bought our land.  That purchase started the greatest and hardest journey of our lives at that point.  We encountered one challenge after another as we started building our home.  We had no business building a home without a proper contractor, and our lack of experience caused lots of problems for us.  But we prayed everyday for everything. We prayed that the roofer would show up, that the electrician would do a good job, that we would order enough doors....and always that we wouldn't run out of money!!  And you know what?  The roofer finally came through, we ended up with enough doors, and even though we are convinced our evil electrician booby trapped things we haven't had too many problems.

This house is a constant example of what God can do if we are willing to do our part.  If we are willing to do things we have no idea how to do, but have the faith to try, He will make us powerful enough to do it.  Just look at your own life and the struggles and challenges you have encountered...when you believed you could and devoted your existence to that belief you succeeded, didn't you?  And weren't you scared out of your mind?  But you did it anyway.  You went back to school when all the other students were half your age, you went to chemotherapy and survived! or you started a business and that business sustained your family.  You finally found a job you loved after searching forever.  You got out of debt after this horrible recession without loosing everything.  Every story has a happy ending, you just have to have the faith that the ending is the one meant for you, just don't give up.

For us we withstood an angry seller of this land who didn't live up to her end of the contract...but that worked out.
Miracle
When we were in the initial stages of getting our home started we got our plans back from the county with 36 problems on them. Our architect wasn't actually an architect but just a guy with a ruler who didn't really know what he was doing.  We were facing our own Red Sea.  But just when Raymond was picking up the plans he ran into the man who was contractor for the RV park he was building downtown.  He had a contractor for that, we just didn't have the money for one for the house we were building. This man took the troubled plans from Raymond and gave them to a woman who did know what she was doing.  She found so many other problems that we would not have known about, or been able to fix.  Her rendition of our house plans sailed through the county process in a week.
Miracle
Almost every day was an answer to a prayer of some kind.  When you don't really know what you are doing all kinds of things can go wrong.....but we were protected at every turn.
Miracles all.
It wasn't easy, and it wasn't smooth, and it was the challenge of our lives, but we stayed with it and our home is a testament to us of what we can accomplish....if we remember that God can make us powerful.  We know we didn't do this on our own, because we couldn't.....but we have proof that God made us powerful one time.  And now that we have started a business, a hard and competitive business we have to remember we can be powerful and we will succeed, because we did before.  Our lives can become our scriptures.

All four of my husband's grandparents came from Italy through Ellis Island.  They came with very little money, spoke no English and had no place to live once they got here.  But they answered a call, just like the Mormon pioneers.  Like every other pioneer who came to America.  And just two generations later their posterity is numbered in the hundreds.  I am sure they didn't think they were powerful, but they did it.  God knew where he planted them, and He knew what they could do.

So today look at your challenges differently and realize they aren't a punishment, they are a way for God to show you how powerful you can be.  Marianne Williamson has a quote that I  love,

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

And then one more, from one of my favorite souls...

God is anxiously waiting for the chance to answer your prayers and fulfill your dreams, just as He always has. But He can't if you don't pray, and He can't if you don't dream. In short, He can't if you don't believe.”

― Jeffrey R. Holland




Overcome your fears my friends, it might be the challenge of your life....be powerful and be successful.  And never, never give up.

And now for the rest of the story

No need for a long post...this is Miguel from All-American carpet cleaner, my hero.  The price i was quoted on the phone was the price i paid, and he did an awesome job .!....in an hour.
The furniture is already back in place, and servicemaster is a distant memory. 

Miguel made me promise i wouldn't do anything like that again.

Learn from my mistakes...

Your welcome...

I just did what Stevie Nicks would do....

The worst part is I know better!!  But I did it anyway....I went with a special from a carpet cleaning company I had never used before.  Their advertised special is not a special at all.  It is a bait and switch...unfortunately the very nice young man who was given the job of letting me know they could not possibly clean my carpets for their "special" price, but for a price 3x's the amount, was right in front of me and not the woman I spoke to earlier who assured me the price is firm.   The price was, wait for it.....3x's the amount we agreed to!!  (worlds longest sentence...sorry but I am acrimonious!!  No time for pausing)

I told this very nice young man to gather up his equipment and ease on down the road. He called his supervisor, a not very nice man.  Who assured me I did not know how carpet cleaning companies worked.  I assured him I did know how his carpet cleaning business worked.  If I wanted the Gambino family to clean my carpets I would have called them.

The advertised special is the price....unless you want us to bring in all of our equipment and actually do the job.
Or plug in the machine
Or use a carpet cleaning product

Basically the special was lightly dragging a steam cleaner over the carpet.  And when I was not happy with it he would just say, I told you to do the deep cleaning, can't help you, sucka.

I am so sorry I gave in to my need to find a better deal.   My daughter's boyfriend is coming for the weekend and at noon today I looked at my ancient carpet and thought I have to get this cleaned.  It looked like the bottom of a bird cage.  My regular company increased their prices and I was trying to save some money, so I called someone else who advertised a great deal.  I put all the furniture outside, in the kitchen and dining room.  You know that look?  The one after the hoarder police have gone through the hoarders house?  Cleaning carpets is a great excuse to deep clean every thing and get the Cheetos out from under the couch.  But I like for the process to happen within the space of one day.  Not so on this one....my regular guys can't get here until 1 tomorrow.  I am up on blocks

 I definitely make an impression on my daughter's boyfriend each time he comes.

The first time he came my husband was arrested and spent the entire day in jail.  Suffice it to say over zealous police and a bench warrant for a ticket he had paid.  We just had our insurance overhauled and gone through, you would think they would find his license was suspended.  It was mortifying.  But my husband was able to make many new friends....

The next time he came my husband threw his back out and couldn't get out of bed.

The next time the air conditioner was leaking in the room he was staying and water was everywhere along with a warped ceiling.

The next time he got sick....oh my.

Well the good news is we can lay on the floor in the den, watch TV, eat popcorn and throw it at each other....

Please don't let it rain.

An accepted intrusion, an ornithic experience

Ornithic:  Having to, or pertaining to, birds.

We live in a decidly rural area of Clark County Nevada.  Our roads are paved but that's the extent of our development.  We love the "rural standards" here, streetlights and sidewalks are at a minimum and even very few curbs and gutters. But to the quail, rabbits, chipmunks, roadrunners, hummingbirds, doves, and the occassional coyote, we are an intrusion.  Hopefully, an accepted intrusion.
Early This morning I took my dog outside and we startled three quail that were on our patio. Quail mom and Quail dad flew onto the roof, and Quail junior fled to the open side door of our garage.  All at warp speed. The outpouring of concern from Quail mom and Quail dad was very dramatic and very loud. I have lived here for eighteen years and the quail still amuse me the most. Their actions always make them appear worried and in a profound hurry,  like they are returning an over due library book just before the doors closes.  Since Quail tend to walk very fast instead of fly they embody the word scurry. I didn't think of this before but scurry must be an amalgam of scared and hurry.....and that is how they appear to me. I can almost hear Quail mom and quail dad talking to their brood, "let's go let's go! Hurry up! Hurry up!"....and off they go, scurrying for their very lives......across the backyard, on top of the fence, down the street...scurry, hurry and faster. I have watched a whole family of quail cross the road, and then after a second, the mom runs back to get one slow little quail, as though they are in a constant fire drill. She then appears to give that little quail the what-for all the way back to the others.
I usually step away as quickly as i can when I Intrude on my wildlife friends but for some reason I wanted to watch this particular quail dilemma play out. How do they solve the problem of being separated from their children?
The Quail parents are on the roof, while junior is in the garage, running in circles. (sound familiar?) Quail children are just as neurotic as their parents which solves the nurturing versus nature question. I notice that the mom quail is on the roof looking at where junior went into the garage while dad quail is on the roof on the other side of the garage.  And they are loud!  The adult quail seem to be angry with each other as well as their offspring....I can almost hear them say, "oh what to do, what to do?"  So I reach in and hit the button to open the garage door and hope they figure it all out.  And they do, Baby quail runs out of the open door with his parents right behind him.....

As a parent I realized I have a lot in common with Quail.  I got it right then that we aren't all that different.  And why would we be?  We are all created by the same being, the same force, the one who put into us the desire to "fill the measure of our creation".

And that made me smile.

The Funniest Thing Ever...

A man who lived in Cleveland Ohio was a true Browns fan.  He wrote his own obituary and when he died his family had it published in the paper.

"As part of my funeral I would like 6 Cleveland Brown football players to be my pallbearers, that way the Browns can let me down one last time."

Now that's funny......

While we are on the subject I would like my tombstone to read,

"I told you I was sick."

And in lieu of a barbaric funeral just put me in a hefty bag for Tuesday pick up.

I think that takes care of my will......

The Unpardonable Sin

I think we have all been watching the amazingly rapid and efficient demise of Paula Deen.  And since we view things from our own history we having been watching with different stages of alarm.  As a working person it is hard to see how quickly a career vanishes.  She has worked her whole life but literally backed into her fame.  No need to go into her story, we all know it, and we loved it.  Because she became a success from nothing and everyone loves the Rocky story.

But then she committed the unpardonable sin.  The pattern of the sin is actually one that is in every family.  The one thing you never say, your families unpardonable sin...the one thing that is not to be spoken of.  And because you love your family and respect each and every one of them you just don't talk about certain things.   For instance everyone knows that Great Grandma Mabel didn't have a 8 and half pound "preemie".  But we don't say anything, right?  Cousin George came home from the Army.....early.  No questions asked, and no one talks about it again.  Uncle Shug married a stripper, who took all of his money and moved to Chicago.  It happened, but it is painful to bring it up so we don't.

Our country, our family, allowed an unspeakable thing to occur.  It may have been a long time ago, but it still happened.  In a country founded on freedom we denied that freedom to a great many people.  We allowed them to be treated inhumanly for a very long time.  Only after the most bloodshed our country has ever had in any war, was it finally over.

So now we have blessedly decided as a nation to never say the "N" word.  That word has become verbal pornography.  It conjures up a time in our history that we should be deeply ashamed of.  It is actually a very small consolation, and we don't say it......ever, and when our black brothers and sisters say it,  that is their business.  They own that word, after hundreds of years of subjugation, I think they can do what they want with it.

I grew up in the South, I remember "colored" bathrooms, and "white only" signs.  As a very young I had the most profound experience.  In a black grocery store I reached for a tomato at the same time a black women did.  She drew her hand back quickly in deference to me.  And at that moment I heard a voice in my head say we weren't really different at all because we all liked tomatoes.  I know that is simplistic but I was 6 and that is how you teach 6 year olds, I never forgot it.  Paula Deen grew up in the South and maybe she used the "N" word long before she knew how damaging it was, how belittling it was.....how dirty it made people feel.  It was a word designed to make people feel like they were in fact 3/5 of a person.  We get that....we get that now.

The public outcry is a testament to how much we hate that word today, unfortunately Paula Deen handled everything badly after those documents came out.  Her reaction wasn't very polished or clear.  I watched her being interviewed by Matt Lauer, (I personally loathe him, but whatever.)  and I watched him tear her apart.  He has had plenty of his own indiscretions and personal sins revealed to not act like such a prosecutor.  What I wanted was for her to look in the camera and with clear eyes and calm demeanor state - "I was wrong!  That was a different person from a far different world.  I am sorry, I am ashamed that my grandson knows I used that language.  I am sorry that the people who watch me and buy my things now know I used that language.  It hasn't happened since and it doesn't happen now.  And I will spend the rest of my life proving that."   Personally I would have taken Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton and Shaquille O'Neal with me, I would have begged their forgiveness....and meant it.  Then I would answer Matt's "gotcha" questions.

I don't wonder about Paula today.  I know that she campaigned for President Obama, she has black people on her show all the time....for heaven's sake her food is "soul food".  Honest to goodness racists don't do that.  And I know she is in shock about what has happened.  To watch your whole life unravel in front of you, to be rejected by every major company you were partnered with that you thought loved you, has to be the worst time of your life.  Unfortunately she will never be the same...and I will miss her.  I watched her not because of her cooking, but because she made me happy.  She loves life!....she loves her kids, her husband, Savannah Georgia and she loves to cook.....but most of all she loves people.  That cannot be faked.

I will miss that laugh.  She has a great laugh.  And one thing I know about personalities like hers, someone who truly loves people it will take a long time for her to get past the rejection to be able to go out and change the perception of her.  But I so hope she does.  I hope she isn't remembered as a racist, but if she doesn't get out there and show people what she is really like that this chapter could be her epitaph.

Forgiveness is a tricky thing, the Savior was very clear that we were to forgive everyone.  And regardless of your higher power that is a great way to live.  I certainly have forgiven her....Oh no!! does that mean I have to forgive Matt Lauer too?

Forgiveness is what our country needs from every direction.  

Boy do I need some advice....

This is the little town I grew up in.  Kemah Texas.  It was filled with shrimp boats just like this one.  You can't smell the fish and the diesel but I can....I just wish I could take you to a real old fashioned shrimp boil, you would never be the same!!

Dearest friends.....
I have a dilemma, advice please.  I am asking for it, so don't be shy, just be honest.  I have two blogs....this one, "My life from the Bleachers" which has been my clubhouse, my refuge, my port in the storm.  I come here to be honest or mad or grateful, happy or sad.....  I don't have to be a great writer on this blog, I don't feel Marilyn Arnold (my college writing professor who wore horrible shoes and taught me so much.  If only I could have helped her as much with her shoes as she did with my writing) looking over my shoulder.  I write for me.  My other blog is the one I was told I should do by people who know these things.  It is a business blog.  My husband and I started a catering company and I was told to blog about it...they liked My life from the Bleachers and wanted me to advertise the business by blogging.

Guess what happened?  Nothing....the blog I started for the business seems blah and uninspired.  I don't like to go there. But now I don't write on this blog because I feel guilty that I should be writing for our catering business.  Because, well, we need the business.  Being on Facebook and the few blogs I have written about our parties or weddings have been beneficial.  People see my husband's work with food and flowers and we have been hired for several jobs because of it.

So now I am torn...I don't have time for 2 blogs.  Actually, I don't have the talent for 2 blogs....so what would a professional social media specialist advise me to do?

I just read the blog of one of my favorite bloggers crashtestdummydiaries (go there!!)  l enjoy her blog because she gives me a chance to read about her real life, warts and all.  She is honest in her writing.  If you clean your life up too much it is sort of like a body with no bacteria at all. You will end up with some kind of nasty infection, because we need a little bacteria.  Opposition in all things right?  We must know the sorrow to appreciate the joy.  I rarely learn anything when there isn't problem solving involved.  Solve a problem!  I do know one thing, you can't solve a problem    if     you     don't    admit    you    have     one!  One of the greatest things about the family I grew up with is how we treat our crazy people.  All families have crazy people, but we weren't ashamed of them...we brought them right out on the porch for all to see.  My Uncle Homer was a benign alcoholic and he was definitely right out on our porch.  Remember this was the age before Oprah, we didn't know how to have an intervention, or tough love or any of that.  We just loved him and accepted his limited contribution to our lives.  Life is better now that Oprah has shown us how to fix everything, or is it?  Uncle Homer died with his favorite nephew, my dad,  right next to him.  I won't minimize the tragedy of a misspent life, but I won't minimize the importance of unconditional love either.

My other favorite blog is called "Entertaining Women" (go there!!)  One of my hobbies is tablescapes, and she is amazing.  She is a real Martha Stewart.  I go there for inspiration, and peace.  I don't know much about her, except her name is Cherry, she loves the Lord, her family, and shares her talents with all of us.  She inspires me to do a better job of making the tables for our business beautiful. She reminds me of a part of my life I really enjoy.  And when I worry that I am not contributing to the business I look at her blog and realize making things beautiful is a big part of the business of catering.

When I was little I lived on the Galveston Bay.  I would go every day to watch the water and peek in the windows of the Corinthian Yacht Club.  I loved seeing all the tables set, linens beautifully white, crystal and silver shinning.  I still think of it whenever I set  a table.

I have learned a lot over the last 4 years.  The truest being,  treat everyone as though they are having the worst day of their life and you will be right 50% of the time."

Sobering isn't it?  It is also our opportunity to share each others burdens.  Life is not Facebook where everything is wonderful, all bathing suits fit perfectly, all babies are beautiful and all weddings are perfect.  Not everyone is going on a vacation this summer.  Not everyone's child is a joy, not every doctor's appointment ends with just one suggestion that we lose weight.  Sometimes life turns on a dime.  One phone call or one trip to the store could change our life. That is when we find out how tall we really are, when we are in over our heads.  And we need each other.

I have discovered we want status quo, we want to control everything.  We don't want anything to get in the way of our checklist journey through life.  Make the bed, walk the dog, get in the car, go to the dry cleaners, go to work,  pay the bills, blah, blah, blah....do you have time to help someone?  It is the way to feel as though you make a difference.  To just take the time to listen to someone and maybe help with a broken heart.

It is funny how we compare ourselves, our disheveled selves, to everyone else's best day!
I would love to be remembered for my best day but I will probably be remembered as the woman who screamed the loudest and most obnoxiously at football games.  I cringe about that now, definitely not my best days.  Which is why my prayer will always be " Lord, keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth".

So now you tell me, my problem solvers, what do I do?  Do I write 2 blogs?  

I guess I could........

I want to write about my husband who will not give up, I want people to know he started this business with the utmost faith that God would see him through.  I want people to know that my ecclesiastical authority has no doubt we will succeed.  And right now when morale in our country is so low, we need the courage to take a chance.  And we can get that courage from each other.   We need to believe we can succeed with the talents God has given us.  We need not be afraid to accept help, but we also need to give help.  Where much is given, much is required.  The Lord has given me the most remarkable friends in the world.  I am loved and helped every day.  And when I get really low they remind me to realize how powerful I can be.  And we all are powerful when we walk with whatever higher power we have in our lives.  Mine is Jesus Christ..... and whatever higher power you adhere to,  use it.  We just have to believe.

Do you see what I do?  I go off on tangents that Professor Arnold would hate.  Can't be good for my business.  I will make people run into the dark Nevada night.

So what do you think about my blog dilemma?  Leave a message anywhere....on this blog, on Facebook for all to see, or message me...on my email, TexDona@gmail.com      I want to help expand the business, I want people to see the amazing things my husband creates, and I want to write about other stuff too.

Hmmmm....help!!

St. Francis.....

I was thrilled yesterday when it was announced that the new Pope would be called Pope Francis.

One of my favorite sayings is " Preach the Gospel everyday, and if you have to use words."  St. Francis of Assisi.

That is a great way of saying... be yourself, but be a really good version of yourself ...because who you are is what you are preaching.  You know, your brand.  The saying doesn't even have to be religious, actually, everyone should be their best self.

St. Francis of Assisi said it first...

I said it after him.

And then Pope Francis said it this morning because St. Francis said it.

Raymond and I got married at St. Francis, so If you have carefully followed the trail I developed you can see I feel connected to Pope Francis.

What's not to love about Pope Francis?  He paid his own hotel bill, rode the elevator with all the Cardinals (who knew Popes rode in elevators alone?) and then got in the car with the Cardinals.  The Popemobile remained Pope-less.  Then he asked the Cardinals to bless him before he blessed them.
He seems like a regular guy.  We love regular people...and when those regular people become our leaders we love it when they remain regular people.  

I cannot even imagine the pressure he feels right now being the shepherd for such a large flock.  Our prayers are with him....I think Pope Francis is going to be a great Pope.

Sequestration, Texas Style...

Aunt Stuff stopped by last night and as always, we talk politics.  Aunt Stuff is an avowed democrat and had told me she will change her party when "hell freezes over".  Also according to Aunt Stuff, if there is one republican left on Earth, hell will never freeze over.
My politics are a bit right of hers so our conversations can become, "spirited".  This time I wanted an explanation.  "Why, O Why Aunt Stuff with all the places they could save money would they chose the  White House tours?"  She gave me that look and said, "let me tell you a little story, it might help you understand."

Now I know Aunt Stuff's stories, she never lets facts get in the way of a good story, and I never know where that line might be, so I take all of her stories with a grain of salt.  So you decide, but here is what she told me.

"In Palo Pinto County Texas in the 1930's times were hard and my aunt and uncle were struggling like everyone else.  Uncle George went to Aunt Tillie with what he saw as a solid solution to his problem.  They had a complicated marriage, she was a fiery Irish girl and he was a pretty buttoned up guy.  Their marriage worked because they followed a few simple, but unspoken, rules.  Being the good Baptists they were, they attended church every Wednesday night and every Sunday.  This was mostly Aunt Tillies rule being the better Baptist, she was just watching out for Uncle George's eternal soul.  Uncle George saw a bit of leverage and made sure there was some strong "cuddling" on Wednesdays and Sundays.  There was one untouchable rule, Aunt Tillie's once a month trip to the "Your Crown and Glory Beauty Shop".  She was a redhead and as you know after a certain age red is not a color that comes naturally to most women. Unfortunately Uncle George's new found austerity measure was Aunt Tillie's once a month stop at the "Your Crown and Glory Beauty Shop".  He told her he was sorry but they had to cut back expenses and they were starting with her red hair.  Aunt Tillie didn't say anything at the time, but the next Wednesday Uncle George was hugging his pillow instead of his favorite redhead.  When the pillow hugging continued on Sunday he asked about it....Aunt Tillie told him she was sorry, but she had to make some cut backs, and that is where she started."

The next Wednesday Aunt Tillie got her hair done and Uncle George didn't hug the pillow.

Aunt Stuff looked me straight in the eye and said.  "I don't know who is Aunt Tillie and who is Uncle George in this Sequester mess, but if one party wants sex they are going to have to let the other party get their hair done. "

Hard to argue with that kind of logic.

Hoarder's Part Deux

No, you aren't seeing things I have attached this picture again because I love it.  Her stuff looks interesting, not dirty, and her face is priceless.

I need everyone to step up their game and share the inventory.

So far only the organized have come forward....well one sister in the trenches...but come on!  We can conquer this if only so that when we need to find a pen that writes we can.  Baby steps...inch by inch is a cinch.

How about a box that contains everything you need to wrap a gift?  My present action plan is lacking success.  Because I.....
1)  buy a gift and forget to get a gift bag.
2) go home and find wrapping paper
3) find paper, but where are the scissors?
4) found the scissors, I used them to trim the dead parts off the plant in the dining room
5) no scotch tape...anywhere
6) use a glue gun....
7) burn my finger so I abandon the glue gun idea
8) completely give up and take the gift in the store bag, exchange gift tags at the gift table with a gift wrapped like royalty.
9) enjoy the evening

This morning I went through an entire stack of magazines.  I kept the Christmas ones, and the one that said I could live longer and get rid of unwanted hair.  Even Susie Vogel would keep that one.  Evidently she is the new patron Saint of organization on my blog.  I gave her a battlefield promotion.

But then I missed the garbage pickup this morning!! My guys must get up on Monday morning with the sole intent of coming before I am ready for them.  I could put it out the night before, but I live on the Prairie and sometimes the critters get to my garbage before the disposal technicians do.

So what shall we organize next?

I am learning from Jan who said she cleaned out the attic and her semi-hoarder husband didn't even notice.

I don't want to clear out everything, some of my stuff makes me interesting.  When I read a book I keep it...as a reminder of a good time.  I have a ficus tree that I got 34 years ago.  True story.  Raymond and I found it in back of a florist and brought it back to life, and it is still doing just fine.

I am mostly sad about my closet, not that it is so unorganized, because it isn't but because so many of my clothes don't fit and I don't want to get rid of them.  It is like conceding that this body is OK.  I will need Dr. Phil for that one.

To all of my friends who are such great chuckers, there is a lot of thought that goes into my selective hoarding.

So I am regrouping and hoping for more ideas.  Everyone is curious as to what great stories we do have to tell.

Seriously!

Hoarder? Me?

The show "Hoarders" makes me so uncomfortable.  I have only been able to stand a few minutes of it, because when the poor folks find out they have to part with their stuff I feel so badly for them.  Don't get me wrong, I want to chuck their things out the back window just like you, but there is something painfully sad about how they look at a bag of panty hose and just cry.  They all say the same thing, I will use that someday.  On a much less intense level I have done the same thing.

I am an odd hoarder, I don't have the kind of mind boggling assortment I have seen on the show, but I have stuff.  I admit to having a hard time throwing things away.  Even after going through my dad's things after he passed away.  He had an airplane hanger that was filled with stuff.  After having to find a place for 5 non-working refrigerators I still keep more than I should.  It should have cured me...like aversion therapy.
My dad had so much stuff that it took almost 2 years to go through everything.  My uncle kept saying, "call the auctioneers!"  But I couldn't, I was too connected.  So it took forever.....the day I walked through his empty home the last time was such an emotional moment.  I wondered how much he would have loved the order...and then I knew, he would have hated it.   His personality was such that he had to be surrounded by stuff.  Is that where I am headed?
In my bedroom is a stack of magazines....
Books to read....
Drawers of clothes that don't fit...but they will!
Notes to be filed in appropriate places rather than on 50 different scratch pads...
a drawer full of pens, glue sticks and pencils
a drawer full of wires, mostly computer connections to computers or electronic devices i don't even have any more, or do I? What if I need some of that and I don't have it?  I won't even know how to ask for it at Radio Shack.  I better keep that drawer full of stuff.
In the library I have stacks of stuff...I move them around as though that will cause them to shrink.  Bills, phone numbers I may need, reports to read, more bills, pictures and papers I have no idea what to do with.  This room also has a computer that doesn't work but has all my pictures and documents on it.  Money is what is keeping this from being fixed.  I would love to drive to Best Buy tomorrow with my computers, the lap top is on life support also, hand it to them, pick out a new computer wait while they transfer everything....maybe even get a different device for my pictures and GO HOME!!  The I would hook it up with the biggest smile known to mankind and start writing in my beloved library.  I love writing in the library, all my books are there, but the computer is broken, so I use my daughters computer which is annoying to me because it is an Apple, and I have to try and get used to that....I am only marginal on computers as it is.
Yikes!!

Doesn't this part of my life look like a giant ball of twine that was rolled up by the rabbit from Alice in Wonderland?
 I crave order but I am something of a hoarder.
And isn't too much stuff toxic?  My husband had papers and maps from a failed business venture.  He stopped using that area...we all just avoided it completely.  It seemed possessed.  Then one day he just cleared it out, threw all that stuff away, moved the desk to another position, and just like that, we could use it again.
What is your fave "cleansing" story?  How do you get rid of things?  Are your drawers orderly?  closets streamlined?  How long do you keep bills? Can we just keep them online...
Help a girl out with some good advice...Just one thing maybe?
Please?

Miracles Do Occur

We go through life expecting a certain outcome.  We get in the car and expect to end up where we planned on going.  We expect everyone to come home at the end of the day.  We expect the blender to work when we flip a switch, the oven to turn on and the vacuum to work.  We expect the remote to change channels and the bread to be fresh when we buy it.

And we are shocked when that doesn't occur.  Have you ever turned on the oven and waited for it to get hot only to discover it, "wernt (a word my dad always used) never gonna get hot." ?

It is funny how we expect things to go a certain way as though we have some kind of guarantee.  But there isn't a guarantee.  Things go wrong.....a lot.  Appliances break, people have car problems, we lose buttons, and papers.  Sometimes we forget to pay a bill.  We get turned down for things, broccoli gets stuck in our teeth and sometimes we burp exactly when we shouldn't.

But occasionally in the midst of things going wrong, something goes incredibly, inexplicably right.  

I have found I am not very grateful, I expect to be without a headache, I expect there to be money in the bank, I expect my hair to turn out and I expect the milk to be fresh.  So when those things don't occur I am shocked, angry and frankly indignant!  How dare the world not spin just for me?  I am kind of a Scarlet O'Hara, but without the really tiny waistline. 

Earth life, as far as I can tell, is a place for us to see what we are made of.  God already knows us completely,  we just have to find out for ourselves.  How do we react when no one is looking?  How much can we go through?  How kind can we be?  What do you do when push comes to shove?

The reason for this posting today is tell my little story.  One year ago my son told me about pain he was having in his shoulders.  He didn't know where it was from, he plays football in college so we assumed that is what caused it, even though Mikey said it just came from no where.  So we did what anyone would do, we went to the doctor provided by our very expensive health insurance.  (premiums we pay for ourselves.)   He didn't have a diagnosis.  He simply said, "It won't get better, it won't get worse."  We thought that was odd, but we are trusting people, so he shot him with cortisone and off we went. 

The relief lasted 2 months.

Back to the Doctor in March, this time he got a MRI.  Results show?  Nothing... according to the Doctor, no diagnosis, more shots.  Spring football starts, lifting starts, and the pain is now keeping him up at night. 

We go back to the doctor the end of May, more shots, no diagnosis....see ya!!  Now we are starting to wonder what is going on, the pain never got better, and football, which is how he pays for college so it is like his job,  is about to start.  He gets more shots in August and not one doctor has tried to make this better, they just mask the problem.

He has a pretty miserable season because he was hurting all the time.  We had no idea what to do.  So I sent all of his xrays, MRI and doctor notes to our cousin back East who is an orthopedic surgeon.  He tells us it can be treated with a 30 minute arthroscopic surgery.  No one suggested that before.  A diagnosis and a plan!

So he went back to the doctor in December (on our insurance we can only see one orthopedic practice - so he asked to see another doctor in the practice) With all of his papers, 3 case studies on the kind of problem he had to show the doctor according to our cousin.  The new doctor?  Well he started off with, you will never play football again, I will have to put a plate in, and here are some more shots!!  He was devastated, it was no longer about football, it was about being in constant pain with not one doctor trying to help him.  We had no where else to go.  The only orthopedic practice he could go to has basically ended all of his options.  With no recourse and no relief.  Except now the news is he will never play football again.

But here is the miracle...and it does happen.  It is not in me to give up, especially when I know there is an answer.  So we went to see the patient advocate at the orthopedic practice...face to face.  She could see he had never gotten a real diagnosis.   So she reached out to the insurance company to help us get another opinion from a whole different doctor. Miracle.... How she was able to see that and the doctors couldn't is still a mystery, but I am so grateful she did. The insurance company gave us authorization to go to a highly recommended doctor which we did one week later.  Another miracle..He diagnosed the problem in a 30 minute visit...all very similar to our cousin.  Another miracle....

Two weeks later he had the surgery and right now he is going to rehab and taking loritabs.  It was a bit more extensive than they thought since he had been playing and lifting on a problem that was simply masked.  He was lucky it wasn't worse.  Another miracle.

The new Doctor said he would be just fine.  Do you hear that other doctors?  He will be just fine.

So back to my original thesis...we expect a certain outcome, and we are shocked when it doesn't occur.  I expected the doctor to help him.  He must have known about the surgery Mikey eventually got, why didn't he offer it?  I am grateful to the patient advocate, I know she went out on a limb to help us.  And I am so grateful we were able to go to a doctor who was able to fix the problem......I know Mikey was watched over.  I don't know why the process took so long, but I feel there was a purpose to the whole situation.  I may never know what it is, but there was a reason.  I feel it, just like I felt there was an answer to his pain.  Feelings go a long way.  Don't ignore them.

The moral of my story?.....never, ever give up.  If you feel something isn't right, incomplete, or wrong, trust your instincts.  Keep going until you are satisfied.  It is the right thing to do.  If you have to play the Braveheart speech a million times to gird up your loins to handle it, do it.  Never let anyone tell you to accept what you know is wrong.

And never stop expecting miracles, even in the middle of a bad situation, good things can still occur.

PTWB (Post Traumatic Writer's Block)

So I have missed writing...putting words on a page is something that makes me happy.  I was so busy in December that I couldn't concentrate on writing..I would only have a minute or two, and it just didn't work.

Then my computer stopped working.

I could use the ipad (not good for writing - typing on an ipad is like running without shoes, you can do it, but it isn't comfortable) or use Ashleigh's computer.  I hate using someone else's computer, for one thing where is spell check?  I mean I knew where spell check was on my computer, but not on this one.  It is not good to use someone else's computer....It just seems too personal for some reason.  However I did discover how to back space fast.  Hey, I am not good with computers anyway, but I went from a PC to this Mac.  Not easy at all.

So, here is how it went down...I didn't have time to write, I was uncomfortable with a different computer...And then I discovered all of these weird, quirky "things" about myself.  Like I am no longer flexible, I get anxious too easily, and I worry too much.  So now I can't write unless everything is perfect.  Who am I?  Then I saw a website filled with the "rooms writers write in".   I was in good company except for one thing,  they were writing....I had writer's block and I was quirky.

Not sure how the quirkiness is going to wear.

My new found quirkiness has changed me completely, I still like Stevie Nicks and James Taylor....I loved the sparkly stuff at Christmas, and the music... I love decorating for Christmas.

Lemon bars.  I really like lemon bars, and s'more bars.

I like to put a ton of blankets on my bed scrunch under them and pretend I am in a cabin in the woods.

I love that herb tea with the cinnamon and spices in it.  I think it is called Cinnamon and spice, I found it at Costco.  It really is quite fabulous...

I love Duck Dynasty!  My fathers side of the family is from Louisiana,  so all the accents, food and foolishness is so much fun.

I know this post is a bit odd.  I will go watch the Braveheart Speech and muscle through the quirkiness.

Love to you all.

Donna

What's in a license plate?

I must tell you about the personalized license plate I saw today.  It was on a car about 2 car lengths in front of me.  It read, "Biotch".  Seriously?

At first I thought I was seeing things...I mean who  does that?  Who puts such a thing on their license plate?  Of course my next move was to speed up and see who was driving.  I had to see the owner of the license plate.....

Wow, talk about truth in advertising

No kidding,.....this woman's license plate could not have been more truthful.  She could have frightened Hannibal Lecter.  One look at this woman and I locked the car doors....and I was driving down the freeway!

Another entry in my big book of things to never do.

Don't put Biotch on your license plate.

Let people find out on their own.

That special time of the year!!!!

It is indeed the most wonderful time of the year!  That time we so look forward to.....and celebrate every year.

That's right ....mammogram time!

The mammogram mambo!  The TaTa Tango!  The Boobie Bogie!  Oh how I love it!

I was especially fortunate to have as my special technician, Caligula.  Actually that might be insulting to the real Caligula, who was decidedly less brutal.

Oh she had a lovely disposition, cracked a lot of mammogram jokes.  I was especially entertained by how she was able to "squeeze" me in. That sort of humor never fails to put me at ease and distract me from having my delicate girls literally pulled off the front of my back.  She brought me to absolute confusion as we played mammogram twister.  She told to face the machine, put your arm here, and if the machine is "digging" into your arm pit, well we are doing it right!  Hooray!  Love the pain!   And then if standing in this unbelievably uncomfortable position wasn't enough, the computer didn't load up and I had to maintain my stance until it did, or I died.  I am made of great stuff, but i swear i almost fainted.  And Caligula kept smiling,laughing and cracking wise.

And I get to follow this up with a colonoscopy next month.  Our equivalent of flagellation.

The moral of the story is pain seems to be the common denominator to good health.

Who knew?

So this is why

 I wrote this to someone who disagrees with me on everything.  This was mostly about the tea parties and right wing corporate backers.  Good luck to everyone surviving the next couple of weeks.  This isn't my best writing, but this hasn't been my best season either.

 So this is why I believe some of the things I do.....

I didn't think we saw things so differently, but I guess we do.  When I speak to people on the right, and I am sure you know most of my acquaintances and friends are conservative, they feel marginalized by the media and by democratic politicians.  I don't feel there is a difference of opinion as much as there is Global warming which is correct and no discussion.  Abortion with no perimeters and no discussion.  Same sex marriage and no discussion.  The tea party was born because so many people felt powerless.  They banded together to form a party so that they could have a voice.  And what came of it?  Immediately they were branded racist.  Not looked at as though they were trying to shed light on a real concern, which was taxes....they were marginalized.  Because obviously if you disagree with Obama then you were a racist.  In my opinion that is why Obama did so poorly in the first debate, no one has disagreed with him....he isn't used to it, so when pressure is applied he gets petulant and difficult.  And flustered.  The people who love him were so confused after the first debate, how can that be?  He is the most brilliant orator in the world.  He is the smartest man alive.  I will never underestimate him, but I do not think he is the smartest man alive.  I think he genuinely believes government is the answer.  I am all for paying taxes, most people I know have no problem paying taxes...but they are frustrated at what they are paying for.  When you are paying a large amount of money to the government you want your elected officials to be good stewards of that money.  But they aren't.  GM killed me, it was in horrible trouble.  The cars are good ones, I drive GM and I have for 30 years.  But they were no longer able to compete because they pay so much to the unions.  Unreasonable amounts of money.  The company eventually goes into bankruptcy which very few people realize. Most people think Obama saved it...but what he did was take it over and he didn't save the stockholders, they lost everything, but he propped up the unions.   They lost nothing.  I am the middle class, and I pay and pay and pay.  My health insurance has gone up 300 dollars a month, but last week I received 2 preventative care appointments for free, my mammogram is free also and blood work.  I saved 80 dollars for the year, but I spend 3600 dollars more. Thank you Obama care.  It costs almost 100 dollars to fill my car, and I know gas will never go down with Obama at the helm because he hates fossil fuels.  Other countries can drill off of our coasts but we can't.  An endangered fish was the cause of farmers in the central valley of California not being able to have access to water.  That thinking astounds me.  The farmers are the bad guys.  When I was younger we saved the whales, the oceans, the rain forest, really? ...Al Gore makes a movie an inconvenient truth,  my children were forced to watch it and they were graded on it.  If they asked questions (which I have raised them to do) they were made fun of. Their grade depended on it.  That movie has been proven to be filled with half truths....no science can be settled. So who could blame me for being distrustful of green jobs or green anything.  Battery cars don't work - Chevy Volt, enough said.   And every other green industry has been a sham.  I have been involved with water reclamation in Las Vegas, all government did was fight me on it, and not one "green" person ever got involved.....I am conservative and I am accused of being a part of the flat earth society because of it.  Conservatives are accused of not caring about poor people, yet red states routinely give more in charities than blue states.  Biden doesn't even believe in charities, and Obama only gave a significant percentage lately.  Romney has always given 10 per cent or more of his money.  Always.  I understand that we are very far from each other in our beliefs, I just wanted you to know why.  I am weary of being labeled  narrow minded and racist.  I am a good neighbor, I volunteer hundreds of hours of my time every year, I give over 10 per cent of my increase, I have raised great kids who are not a drain on the economy. The left has plenty of contributors, George Soros for one, highly partisan left wing backers are behind Moveon.org and Center for American progress.  Those are huge opinion shifters.  I know they are "non profit" but come one.  And Hollywood?  If an actor doesn't tow the line for Obama they are vilified.  And how many millions come from Hollywood for Obama?  Any Hollywood money going to Romney? They have glamorous, cool fund raisers. Want to know what NBC talked about this morning?  at the beginning of the show?  That Paul Ryan washed dishes at a soup kitchen that were already clean, and the scandal that has now incurred.   Nothing about Libya.....and now Hillary is taking the blame for Benghazi.  I enjoy politics, I majored in it....but this has been a tiresome tit for tat.  A stream of "gotcha's".  I still think the country is getting a divorce and Obama and Romney are fighting over the children.  Thank you for reading.

My High School Reunion...

My high school reunion was held over the weekend.  I couldn't believe it was 40 years....rhetorically, am I that old? 
Oddly enough we are still at that age where if we die people would say, "such a shame she was so young."   but also where we qualify for the seniors meal at ihop.

Suddenly I was  all over the place.  I was eighteen again until I ran into someone from homeroom and had a reality check.  I went from wishing I had dieted to happy I found something with an elastic waist band.  It was surreal. 

 I was thrilled the ice breaker Friday night was very casual, outside-inside, and low light.  We could just ease into the whole thing, and when hot flashes occur I could walk outside. Score!!  I was also happy there were year books everywhere I could use as some kind of game of clue. But so sad there needed to be a book for those that died. 
I went with my wing man, Patti Gunn Thompson.  She wasn't nervous at all....she hasn't had a nervous day in her life.  Patti and I have been friends since we were Juniors.  Someone once mistook her for me so she wanted to see what I looked like.  That was a good day because we have been friends ever since.




Looking back at high school from this distance has been interesting for me.  I wondered what everyone would look like, what their lives had been like and if I would recognize anyone.  This was a better scenario than the twenty year reunion.....at twenty you want to look hot and rich - at forty you just hope the women haven't had too much "work" done..
I found myself looking around at everyone and thinking how glad I was to be there.  And how glad I was that I didn't have to buy an $11 glass of wine.  Peer pressure doesn't exist when you are almost however old we are.

At a forty year reunion you know people have had real challenges, struggles and joy in their lives.  There is a real leveling.  So for a while it was wonderful to take a break and  remember easier times...when responsibility wasn't so heavy, and when our problems boiled down to how our hair looked and if we had a date for Friday.

High school for me was a place I found a voice.  That voice has gotten stronger and I hope wiser...but Clark High is definitely where that voice started.

It's where I learned to dance, and do algebra.....it's where I had my first kiss, and learned unequivocally that I hate chemistry.  
It is where Joan Snyder told me after a speech contest when I came in third,  that if I were a boy I would have won....
It is where I helped trash an entire suite at the Mapes Hotel in Reno after state with my mother sleeping in the next room.
It's where we routinely had riots in the lunch room and our home field was Western High School. And how much we hated that, and how much we hated Western, and how much they hated us!!

It's where I wore a borrowed yellow dress to homecoming and then stepped in mud on the football field with my newly dyed yellow shoes.  That was the same day a DJ on the radio dedicated the song "Sweet City Woman" by the Stampeders to me. I never knew why that happened....but I smile every time I hear that song. 



It's where Patti and I would "drag" Fremont Street on Friday night with a tab and wheat thins.  And drive a hundred miles an hour to get home before curfew.

 It was going to Shakey's after the game....and Macayo's for lunch.

It was hoping 72% was really a B. 

It was a Rare Earth concert.....and hoping your parents didn't see the dent in the car from driving over the medium on Charleston.

 Funniest moment for me?  This one......Marie: You were in my eight grade art class.  Dale:  I took art?

Fight on, Fight on, Keep fighting till we have won.....remember that?

It was memories, good or bad, that are ours forever......

 
 We were just a group of kids who happened to live in the same area and who would make an unforgettable impression on each other forever. We were our first true loves and our first heart breaks.  We were each other alibi's and a shoulder to cry on.  We had each others back before "having your back" was a phrase. 

 We laughed  a lot, and cried a lot.....we sure did worry a lot.  But we still showed up on Monday and tried so hard not to be sent to Mr. Paulsen's office. 

 We had no idea what was really in store for us....and that is why it is all such a sweet memory...

I have felt sad over friends I saw everyday and then never again, but overwhelming gratitude that I had all those experiences and all those friends. 

New friends, new attitudes

I have a new friend, and I love her.  Nita Lee is her name and she is adorable.  We met on a flight from Oakland to Las Vegas at 6 am.  By the way, the comedian who said any flight that requires you to be at the airport before 10 am should be free,  is so right.  I decided before I ever boarded the plane that I was NOT going to speak to anyone.  I was cranky to be up so early, I was suspicious of my breath, no makeup and my hair was in a bun because I used that stuff in my hair that makes it stringy cement.  I looked awful.  I held on to this decision until Nita Lee sat down and pulled out her bible to start studying. Before long I knew that she is from a little town in Texas about 5 miles from where I grew up, loves to study the bible, loves Mary Kay and she loves the Lord.

Before I said a word to her the impression came to, "just let her teach you." 

What?

That's weird, I know everything, but I was too tired to argue, or even think about anything profound.  I was thrilled someone else was going to be teaching.  So I just sat back....

And guess what?  She did.  Teach me....We talked about fear, we talked about faith, we talked about tithing.....but mostly we talked about the Savior.  When we started talking about tithing, I said, "I am intrigued, most churches don't pay tithing.....where did that come from in your life?"  She just kind of stared at me, "It's in Malachi, the old testament"  I knew where the scripture was, what I didn't understand was how she knew.  And then I realized what I was really thinking, and what I was thinking made me a little queasy.    It was pretty prideful.  This is what Nita Lee was sent to teach me........That not only do I not know it all, I don't know very much.  Whereas I had learned about tithing from missionaries, Sunday School teachers, Bishops, conference, and the scriptures......Nita Lee learned about tithing from God.  She read it in Malachi and simply embraced it.  No one had to tell her to do it, it was just there in the bible, plain as day...she read it and did it. 

I felt like a tree stump.

This has been happening to me a lot.  Learning from people I never thought could teach me a thing.  But yet there it is.  Joanna Brooks, Nita Lee, Amber Price........

Joanna taught me that there are all kinds of Mormons.  And it isn't really my business what kind of Mormon they are.  I am here to be obedient, and the Savior asked me to love one another....He just wants me to love, and He doesn't want me to qualify those relationships, to just love easy people who constantly agree with me, nope love all people....Love people and serve them.  Judge them?  I don't think so.

Nita taught me that people love the Savior unequivocally, without bounds....

Amber taught me to accept where people are in the journey,  and just love them. 

People have always been my favorite thing, I love watching them, I love talking to them,  I just love people...I am not as interested in what people believe in as much as I want to know how they got there.  I really love to hear people's stories.  But I have read a lot of angry blogs lately.  There are some angry Mormons out there, and some angry ex Mormons, and then just some angry  people....a lot of anger...

We are totally missing the point of life.....the real point of life is to love each other.  And we are doing a terrible job of it right now.  I am doing a terrible job of it right now.  We have lost any peace we might have.

That is why the Lord sent Joanna Brooks to me, to see another side.  Life is far more 3 dimensional than I ever realized. 

Nita Lee is my friend so I can see the walk that other people have with Christ.....

And then Amber.......her voice is just not heard, and it is frustrating to her.  Frustration is an emotion that needs an outlet or it will explode.  We need to give people the space to vent without judging, or offering a cure to their confusion.  We don't have to give solutions or even advice. But we do need to give each other some time, and some space....just to think things through.  And then let the Holy Ghost do the teaching and advising

I visited a woman a while back that felt disenfranchised.  The church that she loved at one time was not in her life, and she was alternately angry and sad.  I understood both.  She would like to come back, but at this point has no idea why she would, or how.  So I said what I always do, you have to love something big enough to overcome the small things that keep us away.  We are a community of Christ...He is the biggest thing....when we keep our eyes on Him all the other things fall into place.  Whatever that looks like for us.  Let Him lead you.....honestly go to Him with your tantrums, with your heart breaks and pain.  Study His life...try to imagine all the time what He would do in any given situation. 

And so this is why Joanna is my dear friend, I love her gentle emails....the way she hurts when she feels someone is being left out.  And Nita telling me today that she found the perfect wedding dress because Jesus loves her!  And she is so right!!

The Savior is no respecter of people, and when we start looking at each other the way He looks at us, we will be happier.  Because we will really see the kind of world we live in...a peaceful world filled with the most amazing creatures.

I so hope I wrote clearly enough what was in my heart.  Love to all

Matthew 6: 21 For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.

Only Stevie Nicks could sort this out.....

OK, so help me understand this....we are not allowed, on pain of death,  to say anything negative about Muslims.   Some bad film maker makes a movie about Muslims that is awful on every level.   So our president takes out ads in Egypt apologizing for it?  Hmmmm.   Every person from the White House from the president to the dog walker has apologized for it.

I get it, it's horrible.  The guy who made it?  In jail....in America.  Free speech?  Nope,  not if you insult the Muslim religion. 

But  right there on Broadway in New York City is a play called, "The Book Of Mormon".  It is horrible...it is insulting and degrading....it is everything every proper Muslim hates...only our country cares so little about the dignity of religion in America that they give it every award possible. 

Let me get this straight....make a stupid movie insulting the Muslim religion, 14 minutes long, on You Tube and the entire Middle East comes down on you.  The most powerful man in the world apologizes to every Muslim he can find so much for this stupid movie that it gets embarrassing.  But make a Broadway show insulting the Mormon religion, shown every day, twice on Wednesday, give it every possible award known too Broadway. and that is not only fine, but amazing!!   The Secretary of State (someone who tries to mend the fences of holy wars every day) went to the show and afterward raved about it.  Raved....But she stood up in front of the world and denounced a 14 minute poorly made trailer on You Tube making fun of Muslims.....

14 minute You Tube trailer making fun of Muslims bad......huge Broadway show, hit, Tony awards, sold out every night making fun of Mormons....good.

Does this make any sense to you?

Benjamin Netanyahu Prime Minister of Israel, hoping to get the world on his side so that Iran (run by the nastiest, weirdest leader in the world ) won't get the rest of what they need to build an atomic bomb and blow Israel up,  is not worthy of a meeting with our president....Pimp with a limp, Joy and Whoopi?  You bet!!  He is there!!

Sense?

The day our Ambassador is murdered, Obama travels to Las Vegas to campaign.....a place not very long ago he told America not to visit.  A place with 12% unemployment.....and the media sings along with  him.

Sense?

I don't even recognize this America any more.  I am mad a lot.....incredulous all the time. 

I need an exorcism.



 

This wasn't the blog I was planning to write...it just happened

Ok, this isn't the blog I was planning to write, this is one that I had to write....the one I was planning to write I still will, but for now this is it.  I hope you come back in a few days for the one I was planning to write. But for now, what are your thoughts about this?

Have you ever been in a situation where you needed a quick rejoinder and it didn't come until you were standing in the shower a day later?   Why does that happen?  Why can't we be quick and ready for the comeback just like any character in an Aaron Sorkin script?  I love his comebacks...they are as smooth as Cary Grant, witty as Hugh Grant and intelligent as....wow, who is intelligent any more without a writer? I am certain that in today's political scene so many get caught in a lie because they think if they say anything it is better than saying nothing...uh wrong.  If you have nothing to say then use my dad's best weapon, the stare.  It would have leveled Chris Matthews.  Say nothing and stare...I love it.  Stares don't lie..you can't spin a stare.  Just lower your eyes a bit and fasten in on the opponent...and don't stop.  You will never lose.

Living through the politics of last week and now this week make us eligible for some kind of merit badge.   But I would make one of the qualifications for this badge having to attend the morning spin meeting of ALL the politicians...(that's right kids this is a non partisan blog - all of the politicians are guilty of everything I am about to list)

The spin meetings go a bit like this...a gavel strikes the desk (there must always be a gavel, every politician loves a gavel) and the meeting is called to order.
Chairman or chief talking point guy....."Ok here are your talking points...do not try to get cute and go off script.  We are not hiring you for your opinion, only for your hair...so just say what we tell you to say.  Now Buffy and Todd went off script yesterday so they have to go back on the morning shows today, and with a straight face tell America they didn't say what we heard them say yesterday.  As soon as you tell America you didn't say what they heard you say but this is what I really did say, they will believe you......because they are STUPID."

Stupid?   I think when someone says something one day and then tells me the next day they didn't say what they said I might notice.

After all we do have fact checkers, right?

 But then I heard George Will say the fact checkers are not factual.

America!  What are we to do?

It doesn't matter who you listen to, it is no longer news,  it is someone's opinion.  And opinions are like...well I can't really say and maintain my lady like demeanor.

Bill Clinton, Clint Eastwood, Sandra Fluke, and Chris Christie.....who are they to my life?  I mean really...
I feel badly that the Democrats think they need Bill Clinton to close a deal.  I feel terrible that Clint Eastwood made fun of a process that should have some dignity, I do not want to pay for Sandra's birth control...and I am more than a little bugged that she is insisting that a Catholic University should be made to alter their beliefs.  All  for a prescription she could easily get at Wal-Mart for the price of a couple of six packs.  Chris Christie to me was auditioning for 2016, I don't think he even likes Romney.  And how could Obama and Clinton like each other?  Yet there they are...all of them standing together after beating each others brains in not that long ago.  Smiling and pretending...Pretending and smiling. And here we are, treading water until all this is finally over.  Red states, light blue states, pink states, yellow states....

So where do we go now?  How do we make an informed decision when everyone is telling us something different on any given day?

Just put a wet finger in the air.....that is about as knowledgeable as you need to be.

I was in a "how to make and take a poll" class in college.  My professor was a brilliant political scientist who told us unequivocally that a poll can say anything you want it to say.  And it always leans toward the group who pays for it.  No big surprise there.  So I never believe polls, sort of like a butcher never eats his own sausage.  I listened to Tom Friedman yesterday talk about abortion...he said that the Republican platform was extreme in that there are no exceptions for abortions.  I think that particular plank is odd too. How can there never be an exception?  But yet for the last 30 years that plank has been there.  It is supposed to show that Republicans are pro life.  That's how you do it?  But here is the kicker...wait for it.  Tom goes on and on about how this proves Republicans are extremists in that they won't support an exception rule.  Yet when he is confronted with an equally extreme Democratic plank that calls for abortions at any time, including partial birth, third trimester and babies born alive, he doesn't even blink...he says, "I am a planned parenthood democrat and I support the democratic platform.".  If you are to ask me which social issue is my hot button it is abortion, so I have given this a lot of thought.  I know there are situations, such as rape, incest and health of the mother where women should be able to prayerfully make a choice against continuing a pregnancy.  However out of the thousands of abortions that occur, statistically, very few fall under those 3 exceptions.  As for partial birth abortions, and babies born alive, Caligula would be shocked.  I remember a nurse contacting a friend of mine who is a deputy district attorney to report  having to watch a baby die that was born alive from an abortion.  She was ordered by the doctor to put the baby in the next room, unattended,  to simply die.  My DA friend tried to do something about it, but was stopped with this logic, it was legal. According to the law the baby was not a baby, it was an abortion.  Legal? Yep.  Sorry Tom Friedman, you are wrong on this one.  And planned parenthood?....the first 4 topics on their web page are abortion, birth control, morning after pill and sexually transmitted diseases. My mother was an advocate of abortion because she watched a friend in the early 60's die from a botched abortion.  She never wanted that to happen to anyone again.  She thought I was awful.....an extremist. But  I think this is how decisions come together.  We get together in a room and present our ideas.   All or nothing is hardly how any platform should be on any plank  We come together, we reason together and then we have a consensus.  I still live by the credo that if everyone goes away a little unhappy then the fairest thing probably occurred. 

When the jobs numbers come out next Friday think any Republican working for the cause of electing Romney will be happy if they show more Americans have gone back to work?  Sadly I don't.  There is not one sticking point in this election because no matter what is said someone comes out to spin it in their favor.  The campaigns don't seem to care about Americans, just winning...beating the other guy.

Just winning.  And are we all going to lose?  There are 23 million Americans out of work, probably many more than that.  Half of America is on some kind of government aid, and if you think it isn't the easiest thing in the world to get unemployment insurance think again.  My son's company downsized, he lost his job and applied for unemployment.  It was all done online with no accountability at all.  There was no line to stand in, no person to face.....nothing.  It was a very happy day when it was over and he was working. Even though as a college graduate he is working 2 part time jobs, neither in his field.

However even with all this being said, I am not pessimistic.  I believe in America.  I believe that no matter who is elected we will rise up and fix the problems ourselves.  We will start businesses and invent things, we will figure it out.  I believe this country is the greatest country, with the greatest form of government on earth.  A good friend of mine listened to my rant one day and then said to me, "Donna when this is over (meaning the election) we will all be fine."  I think so too...We need to have differences and then agree to disagree.  I hope we can appreciate our differences and understand that nothing works when we all look at the picture the same way.  That is why there are 9 justices, 3 branches of government....yin and yang.....back and forth...no tyranny, no Castro or Chavez.

There has to be someone to tell us when we aren't wearing any clothes.

And I am always happy to do it.....

And Then It Dawned On Me...

I had lunch today with a friend who has been battling cancer for the last 21 months.  I say battling because she has had 4 surgeries, 6 rounds of chemotherapy, a hernia, a colostomy bag, and she has lost her hair twice.

Sounds like a battle doesn't it?

But then something she said to me struck my heart in a way nothing has in a long, long time.  She looked at me and said, "I don't think I realized how sick I have been."

Think about what she said to me....she didn't realize how sick she had been.  How could she not know how sick she has been?  I know how sick she has been...how did she miss it?  And then I really heard what she was saying to me....She knows she has been sick, of course she does, but cancer is not what she is focusing on.  She is focusing on being well.

And suddenly I was even happier to be having lunch with her than I had been one second before!  Right there over a fairly dry chicken breast was a life lesson I so needed to hear.  Her philosophy was suddenly so clear to me and felt so right, I was amazed.  I don't know if she was even ready for my reaction.  I almost yelled, "that is wonderful!  you shouldn't think about how sick you have been!!  You should be thinking about how well you are going to be!!"  There was this clarity of thought I hadn't had before.  I already knew it, concentrate on the positive, but I haven't been listening to my better angels... There are enough Dale Carnegie books and witty books of inspirational sayings in my house to start a library. I was looking at a woman who could be giving up.....but she was doing no such thing.  Suddenly my own challenge looked very different to me. 

My husband and I (and about everyone else in America) have been struggling with starting over, losing all of our retirement and not having any idea which way to go..  My emotions have ranged from angry, frustrated, unhappy, and whining, to just plain ole annoyed....with a huge portion of fear.   I have acted as though hard times should somehow skip over me, leaving the challenges for others.  Definitely focusing on the sickness and not focusing on getting well.   Instead of putting all that energy into building our financial lives back up I chose to spend my time being afraid.  Afraid of losing everything, afraid of big debt, afraid of what will I do when this all crashes?  If stress will kill you, fear slowly suffocates you.

But thank goodness for some reason I was listening today.  And when my dear friend innocently said she didn't realize how sick she had been, she had no idea what a gift she gave to me.  Concentrate on getting well, not on being sick.  I know we have different problems but they all seem to follow the same pattern.  So whatever you are struggling with, concentrate on solving the problem, on being well.  Don't dwell on the situation...put all that energy where it will do the most good.

 The reason we all have different talents is so we can serve each other, the reason we have different challenges is so we can teach each other.  What a great system!!

Lesson learned, now I have to live it.